Lowestoft 1999

Although I was brought up in the Jewish faith to believe in God, I was not saved. I thought I knew all the answers, but didn't know one of them. God can see inside me, the Holy spirit can. I'd been married for six months; I was an asthmatic and I was a watchmaker, the worst thing I could be for that sort of illness and I was trying to build up a little business and I just couldn't handle it. I got so sick of watches, so sick of that environment. 

A watchmaker's life is like this - a bench, your head , that's it! You don't see anything else. If you do you drop something on the floor. Then you have to explain - dreadfully sorry I've lost a part of your watch. I began to look round for an answer. I used to have a chap who worked on the boats who would come in and tell me stories.

 Then my Jewish mind began to work, planning, scheming and I thought if I could get on one of the barges, this would release me from all the worry of my job and things like that and I could get away. It wasn't all away from home, just about five days up and down the river. So I got on this mud barge. I had never seen a mud barge before and my first words were "Good God, what have I got myself into?". I had never seen such a hovel in all my life. I never knew people could live like that. I walked on that mud barge in a nice duffel coat, as I would say properly dressed and when I went down into the hold it was filthy because all they have to light is paraffin lamps.

The walls were black, the people were black and I was on there for three and a half years. In that time I began to realise that something within me needed to be put right. I had no way to go. I didn't know Jesus, I didn't know about Jesus, and I can honestly say I didn't want to know about Jesus. Jesus was the one who used to persecute me at school 'you dirty old Jew boy!' It was in the Ford Motor Company that I met the real Jesus. 

A person came up to me and he began to speak to me. If you want to witness among Jewish people you read Romans 11.11. It's your duty, if you don't bring them in nobody's going to bring them in, so it's your job, those who are born again, who love Him, who serve Him, who read His word, and are blest by His word. This man began to speak to me about Abraham, Isaac and Jacob and I thought to myself "Blooming cheek, who is he, a gentile, to speak to me about Abraham, Isaac and Jacob." I just didn't know. 

I had never read the New Testament, I had never read all the Old Testament or talked about these things, I was totally ignorant. I felt myself beginning to get hot under the collar, I felt myself burning with indignation because of this guy and all he spoke about was the Old Testament. He never mentioned Jesus Christ never mentioned the church, just about the Old Testament. 

I was getting so worked up, I was going to give him a piece of my mind but do you know God put a zipper over my mouth and I couldn't say a word and that made me worse because I was getting madder than ever. After an hour of that he finally packs up and goes. 

Thank God I said and I got released, I didn't know God was doing this to me. I didn't know there was such a power that could do things to people. I thought I was in control of my life. Then this chap came the next day, again all about the Old Testament, it was amazing and from that day, I went home more confused, scratching my head, I hadn't got a clue! I finally got home and for some unknown reason I felt happy. I asked myself why I felt happy, I had a lovely wife, two lovely children, I had a job I hated but it was earning money which was the most important thing. I was still doing my watchmaking on the side, so I had a few bob, things were better than they had been. 

The next morning I got up to go to work on my motor bike. It was pouring down with rain and I was going along this narrow road, ( it's got to be a narrow road, because that's the way of the Lord, on a broad road you can turn off.) Lo and behold I looked over to my right and there was this Jesus Christ (I don't know how I knew Him) going up the hill to be crucified and there were all these people, and there again I didn't know why, it was saying to me He did some wonderful things amongst us.

I am saying to these people "Why don't you help Him?" Those were my first thoughts. He did those wonderful things for them and yet no one was lifting their hands to help Him. Then a voice said to me "You're too late, He's dead". Now I was arrogant, proud, you name it, that's what I was and I wept all the way. It was pouring down with rain on the outside. It was a good job the chap in the sidecar didn't know what was going on, he'd have jumped out. The timing of God is so perfect when He is dealing with you. When I got to the brow of that hill, another voice said "He's not dead, He's alive". I didn't know how to praise God, I didn't know anything, but it's what's inside you that counts. It's what is birthed inside.

Something was happening inside which I couldn't touch, but which I could feel. Joy began to well up in me and it was full of glory. By the time I got to work all the old depressions and thoughts started to come back to me. Then suddenly I began to think of the reality, something I never really knew, something I never understood. I'd heard two voices, one was from the devil one from God. The one from the devil made me weep because I thought I was too late, but the other gave me hope and encouragement to go on and I looked up to that factory roof and said," If there is a God, if there is a Jesus, I don't know what I'm saying, but Lord save me. Do something with me because I need something to be done in me." I couldn't help myself, I was desperate for somebody to reach out their hand and to touch me, someone to reach out and set me free from all the frustrations. 

Then this beautiful, wonderful, glorious shaft of light came down and I just felt as if a sack of rusty nails had dropped off me and fell to the floor with a thud. I turned round expecting to see a sack but of course there wasn't anything there, Jesus had taken it hadn't He? That's reality, He took it. It was the most amazing thing that ever happened to me in all my life. You read in the book of Acts, and all through the Bible the amazing things that happen when the Spirit of God comes upon a person. 

We had great big metal cages full of sheet metal, and I walked straight though the metal in that cage, and I came to the iron doors and again I walked straight through. I didn't even feel anything. There was an inspector sitting there and I walked over to him, got him by his lapels, he must have been 15 or 16 stone and I just picked him up like a piece of paper and I looked into his eyes and said "I've just seen the light". Do you know what? I knew he didn't understand what I was talking about, so I dropped him and there was another inspector there in a white coat, and I walked up to him "I've just seen the light". 

I think God was just showing something, that when He gets hold of your life things change. It's not important how big the change is, the thing is God did it. God deserves the Glory for it.